Chillax. Gaydar. Shopaholic. Pornucopia… yep, I finally made the scriptwriting team for Made in Chelsea. Actually, no. This week we’re talking portmanteau words – words that combine the sound and meaning of two other words. They’re all the rage these days, aren’t they? Back in war time our forefathers were rationed to one – smog – but today it seems you can’t come up with any new concept without someone trying to turn it into a portmanteau word.
Brexit, for example. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh! I said it.
Brexit is a horrible portmanteau word and not just because it’s become the most soul-destroyingly tedious debate in current affairs. It’s a bad portmanteau word because there’s no craft to it.
Lewis Carroll would turn in his grave, for it was he, one of the greatest of all wordsmiths, who first described such words as being like a portmanteau – a portmanteau being a type of suitcase formed of two compartments that close together. Humpty Dumpty was explaining to Alice how the words in Jabberwocky had been formed; words like ‘slithy’ (slimy and lithe) and ‘frumious’ (furious and fuming).
Notwithstanding the fact that this was an egg talking to a girl on a mind-bending trip, Carroll was onto something. One of his portmanteau words, ‘chortle’ (chuckle and snort), has certainly stood the test of time.
A portmanteau word works when there’s a natural blend between the two original words. ‘Affluenza’ (a malaise afflicting people who are too comfortably off) effortlessly merges the ‘flu’ sounds of ‘affluence’ and ‘influenza’. ‘Chugger’, on the other hand, merely lops the ‘m’ off ‘mugger’ and replaces it with the ‘ch’ of ‘charity’. It’s not clever and it’s not clear either. ‘Chugger’ could have a multitude of unsavoury meanings.
The dweebs who coined the word ‘Brexit’ will argue that it has evolved from ‘Grexit’, which combines one of the ‘e’s of ‘Greek’ with the ‘e’ of ‘exit’ (genius!), and that it’s a valid development of the English language.
Crollocks!
Brexit is a drabomination, a politiful, snoreseating attempt at wordplay, and whatever the referendum on 23 June throws up, the best outcome will be that we don’t have to hear it mentioned any more.
